29/09/2017
Pressure Building & Perfecting
I’m not gonna lie, finding my feet as a wellness instructor/entrepreneur on top of mother/wife/employee/friend, is proving to be quite the challenge. I am a girl who loves and thrives in a routine. I form patterns quickly and use scheduled habits as my default setting to help my thoughts cope with all the new responsibilities that threaten to murder my creative mind-wandering.
Funnily enough, lately, no matter how ‘responsible’ I try to be or how many to-do lists I write, there is no routine in sight! So many new (exciting) roads are forming ahead of me and I feel my feet lifting off the asphalt. I hate this feeling, it feels like spinning. I need grounding and I know it. One part of me says ‘STOP’ Do nothing, rest, throw away the to-do list and just BE! Another part of me says “Ooh look at that bright shiny new client who needs all my focus”, or “Gee that is a great idea for a new book I could start to write” or “Wow a Sanctuary Stretch retreat would be awesome”. Then I remember how easily empathy adds more weight to my shoulders, and my other 4 unfinished books, plus the amount of work a retreat would take to set up properly. I want to cry at my lack of discipline and the idea that there is a graveyard somewhere where all my ideas and passions go to die!
Ok so it’s not quite that dramatic today!…. but don’t get comfortable, it could form into a melt down at any moment.
Running regular classes for movement and mindfulness is such a blessing! What an awesome job, right! And yet as things get busier over here, I am feeling the pressure building. Pressure of any sort immediately conjures up memories of past struggles. I am reminded that I am never my best self under pressure. I become manic easily, trying to combat and control the struggle. And yet I am also comforted by the understanding that each time I have been under pressure, I have come out a little better on the other side.
Perhaps you can relate?
Look back across your life and identify some past pressures. At the time, you may have felt overwhelmed in your lack of understanding, you would surely have felt discomfort, as your natural instincts to resist suffering kicks in. Now, see if you can identify a change in yourself resulting from that pressure. Did you change for the better or for worse?
In my own life I see the times I refused to accept the lesson, and how it led me to an even darker place. I also see the times I accepted the lesson, and saw my own personal prayers answered in subtle increments. We never really see the change happening at the time, it’s only when we look back and think ‘Woah, I am really different!’
So this time I am stepping into the pressure with a little more anticipation than ever before. I am hopeful and expectant of the miraculous changes to appear in my life, once the dust has settled.
Grounding has always been difficult for me, without routine, so then perhaps I am now transitioning into a place where I can learn to be grounded amidst a lack of routine? That idea thrills my heart!
I may not be ‘perfect’ throughout this period, I may melt down occasionally as I adjust to the newness of life, still won’t you join me? In the perfecting process? Push on through seeking the lesson, the transformation. It just may be the answer to your prayers!
08/11/2015
A Waterbearer’s Miracle at 3am*
“HONEY!! SHE NEEDS WATER!!” My husband calls to me in a desperate way, from twenty meters behind me.
It’s 3 am, middle of the City on a Sunday night.
A group of us are staggering from our work Christmas Party (insert excess alcohol here) heading towards the nearest open establishment, a nightclub which was about 800 meters or so up the road. We all worked in hospitality, in a club that opened all day everyday, and the Christmas party had been arranged on the quietest night so that only skeleton staff were needed at work. Being a Sunday night, in the middle of the City, not much was open. My husband was helping one of our overly intoxicated friends to stay upright as she tried to put one foot in front of the other without falling back into the bushes that skirted the footpath.
“I don’t have any water” I replied. I should mention here that I am famous for placing full glasses of water into the hands of those around me who are helping themselves to the unlimited Bar-tab without a second thought. “We are heading to the nearest place with water.” I reminded him.
“HONEY!” He called again, in a higher pitch, as he pulled himself and our friend from the bushes for the third time. “She really needs some water, she can’t do this!”
I began looking around me for a tap on the side of the building, or a bus stop or anything. No Luck.
“I’m sorry Babe, there is no water here, we just have to get her to the club.” I insisted.
“She’s not going to make it that far without some water!” He calls back.
I threw my hands in the air, I know he had had too much to drink, we all had, but what on earth did he really expect me to do? At the time I was in front of a large office block, which had a neat grassy area in front of it, but there wasn’t a tap in sight. Yet as I threw my hands into the air, I looked upwards into the dark night sky. I suddenly remembered my faith, I remembered that I have a relationship with the creator of the universe. I prayed….
“Lord, We really need water, I have no idea where you can get us some, but I know you can.”
I took two more steps along the empty street, and all of a sudden irrigation jets rose from the grass next to me and began squirting out water like a drinking fountain!!
“AMEN! WE HAVE WATER! WE HAVE WATER! AMEN!” I screamed, completely amazed by the accurate precision of God’s perfection and timing. Our dehydrated friend, came swaying over to the sprinklers and manages to slur,”Is it safe to drink?”
I filled my hands and gulped it down, laughing hysterically, “IT’S FROM THE LORD!”. Needless to say, that she had her fill of water and made it safely to the club, where we got her some more water and a cab home. 🙂
Our God is SO AWESOME!
This miracle occurred over 10 years ago, which happened to be a few years before that prophet came to my church and gave me the name “The Water Bearer” . I actually didn’t realise at first how many connections I had had with bearing water until sometime later. Needless to say each confirmation is always incredibly powerful, big or small.
Sharing these testimonies is such a pleasure, to be able to share evidence of how abundant and miraculous God’s impact can be in our lives when we believe and reach out to Him. I’d love to hear some of your testimonies. Please share below.
Inner Angels & Enemies 